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Do you like the holiday story I wrote?

I’m in 9th grade and my English teacher had us write a short holiday story.

What should I title it?
Do you like the story, the writing style?

Cold water soaked her right ankle and oozed quickly down into her favorite shoes, a pair of beaten up converse. “Damnit!” she yelled, though over the loud, pouring rain, her family couldn’t hear her, as they scrambled to get into the silver SUV. They had just started their holiday shopping at the mall for the distant relatives. It was cold, wet, and miserable. Winter. Turning on the radio, her dad hoped to put everyone in a little bit better mood, but the over sung Christmas song by some unknown female pop star looking to cash in on the commercialized holiday put Noel Riga in an even worse mood.
She hated everything about the holiday season. She hated the mindless materialism, the hypocrisy of it all, the crowded malls, the terrible music, and everyone looking for a tip. But most of all, Noel despised that it was a family holiday and that her relatives felt obligated to come over. A fight would always break out, like last year, when her grandma screamed in broken English that she was leaving, and never wanted to see her unappreciative family ever again. The annual holiday party her mom hosted was yet another catastrophe, because her mom’s opinion on clean could rival that of an operating room or a five-star hotel. But Noel couldn’t just help dust and vacuum, she had to do it all while being yelled at at an excruciatingly loud decibel by her mother. It was awful.
And yet another quip of hers was her name. Noel!? There really couldn’t have been a worse name for a Scrooge like herself. She considered going by her middle name for a while, but Carol wasn’t much better.
So, as her calendar got more and more X’s on the month of December, Noel found herself dreading the holiday season more than usual. She wished with a snap she could make it January 2nd, and forget about the horrid holiday’s altogether.
It was her family’s tradition to make their wish lists on December 15th, exactly ten days before the big day. She scoffed at her brother’s list, which was frightfully long and detailed¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬: “#16. Slip on vans, blue with black trim, size 13. Check online.” She pondered what to put on her list. She had pretty much everything she needed or wanted, and the few things she needed or wanted already, and the couple small things she desired could be bought with the money given to her by an aunt or uncle who wouldn’t dare getting a more personalized gift, lest he or she get the wrong thing.
So Noel’s list contained only one item- a drama-free, happy Christmas and Hanukkah celebration. That was all. Unfortunately, she knew her twin brother was more likely to get everything on his long list, which was now being continued on the back of college-ruled notebook paper. She had little hop or faith in her family. “How are we supposed to get you that?” they asked.
Noel sighed. Looks like another crappy December.
But she had spoken too soon. Her mother had informed her that she would be forgoing the holiday party. The relatives came, and went for a walk any time the tension became uncomfortable. The Riga’s even agreed to not play holiday music, unless it was a true classic.
Noel helped her mom put all the old keepsake ornaments in the tree while eating homemade gingerbread cookies, the whole time wearing a (gasp!) Santa hat. And for the first time in her 14 year life, she was proud of her name: Noel Carol Riga.

Asked by:Rose


  1. [= Avril Lover =] says:

    Well, really for her to get that happy that quick seems like it was a movie permiered on TV and they cut out a few scenes, but it was discriptive-I got good mental pics in my head-good job

  2. Julia says:

    It’s good.

    Call it ‘One Christmas Wish’

  3. Sally says:

    i really really like it, the end is a little rushed though.

  4. Ella says:

    i like it but at the end it is a bit confusing how it jumps to her being happy and everything… other wise its great =)

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